


I'll be Here to Help You Heal

by Bisexual_Bean



Series: Catch You, Help You Heal [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: And I'm all for it, Because I'm a salty bitch, If I see slash in the comments Ima FLIP, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Like, Protective Jason Todd, Several hugs to be exact, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, The boy is ready to go to war if you hurt his brother, The saltiness continues, This is a protect Tim and Jason being best brothers space, Tim Drake Angst, Tim Drake Gets a Hug, Tim Drake Needs a Hug, Tim Drake-centric, Tim's feelin real sad but finally gets the love he desveres, we love them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:55:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26254522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bisexual_Bean/pseuds/Bisexual_Bean
Summary: A quick glance around the room told him he was in Jason's apartment, despite never being here before. If the overflowing bookshelves (Arranged by color) that lined the walls, the cramped closet stuffed full with graphic tee shirts and jackets, and the picture frames of people Tim recognized as Roy and Kori and several others he knew Jason was close to scattered along the walls and shelfs said anything.The real question was...Why did Jason bring him here?
Relationships: Tim Drake & Jason Todd
Series: Catch You, Help You Heal [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1904848
Comments: 24
Kudos: 642





	I'll be Here to Help You Heal

Tim drifted.

He knows at one point there was harsh breathing close to his ear, trembling hands smoothing over his arms and the familiar pinch of an IV being inserted into his arm.

At another point the same hand (If the large size of the palm was any indication), long, callused, fingers scratching across his skull and a faint hum of contentment rubble through his chest. It had been followed by a deep chuckle, and then a faint ringing.

And then Tim woke all at once, skin tingling from left over pain killer still working through his system, shoulder securely bandaged, and tucked into an unfamiliar bed, staring at an unfamiliar ceiling.

Just a quick glance around the room told him he was in Jason's apartment, despite never being here before. If the overflowing bookshelves (Arranged by color) that lined the walls, the cramped closet stuffed full with graphic tee shirts and jackets, and the picture frames of people Tim recognized as Roy and Kori and several others he knew Jason was close to scattered along the walls and shelfs said anything.

The real question was...Why did Jason bring him here?

This is Jason's personal apartment if he had to guess. Or at least the most personal of the apartments Tim's managed to find and see. as far as he's aware, not even Bruce knows this place exists.

So why bring him here? Why not any of his other safe houses? Or one of Tim's? Even Tim's own apartment?

The manor?

Why did Jason not just leave him somewhere, then disappear?

Was it guilt? Did he feel guilty for causing Tim to fall?

_Let's be_ honest _with ourselves, you didn't fall._

Another quick scan of the room lead to a bottle of water, unopened, and a bottle of pills on the nightstand next to his head.

Tim hummed, pushing himself up till he rested against the headboard. Taking the bottle of water, he left the pills where they sat. Just because he stopped working under Batman doesn't mean the paranoia left him. Tim was wary of everything and everyone long before he became Robin, and that caution wont be leaving him any time soon.

He mentally winced at the thought, hands momentarily clenching and a sharp crunch broke the silence of the room. Tim sighed, looking down at the now dented bottle in his grasp, unscrewing the cap and taking a small sip.

He would kill for some coffee.

_No Tim, now is_ not _the time to be thinking about caffeine._

Shouts from a room over hit his ears, muffled and hard to make out but obviously Jason. He tilted his head, leg slipping out from under the covers and raising an eyebrow when he feels the familiar shape of a wooden bat at his bedside.

What?

After a few seconds of confusion, he finally realizes how cold it was, instantly tugging his leg back inside the warm cocoon of his blanket. He knew he had to leave, to investigate, but the air around him was damn near frigid, and he _really_ didn't want to leave the blanket.

Tim settled for taking it with him, wrapping it around his shoulders and hiding the bat (Because you never know when you'll need to defend yourself, and he still doesn't know Jason's motive for bringing him here) underneath the sheet.

Outside the room the voices rang clear. Jason's heavy footsteps pacing back and forth on hard wood.

"No Dickhead, you don't get to know where the kid is," A pause. From down the hallway, Tim thinks he hears a low voice reply before Jason's speaking again, "You didn't see how he looked. What he said. I have a strong feeling seeing you or the Bat isn't exactly high on his list."

Tim carefully crept closer, now seeing shadows moving around the room from behind the safety of his corner, "I _dare_ you," Was growled. Sharp and threatening, "I dare you to send B after me. You haven't found this place yet and you won't be finding it any time soon."

He thinks he might have heard a 'Please Jason' from the other end of the phone call and Jason snorts, "Don't think for a second I wont take him out of Gotham to keep him away form you freaks. Getting a kid into this mess then throwing him away like nothing when he's not 'useful' to you anymore? He's not me for fucks sake."

There was more muffled murmuring before Jason interrupted them, "Arkham Dick! The fucking kid was mourning, the little demon brat was trying to kill him, and you threaten Arkham! I thought you were suppose to be better than Bruce when you took over the cowl damnit, not worse!"

Tim flinched back at the words, nails digging into the fabric of the blanket. Unfortunately, the floor creaking beneath his foot was an easy give away, teal eyes latching onto him as Jason steps into his line of sight.

Jason stares at him, obviously surprised to see him awake and wandering down the hall if his apartment, but he doesn't speak, instead holding a single finger up, sighing deeply into the phone, and once again disappearing from view.

"Just...get your shit together. Get it all figured out. And if- Not when Dick- _if_ the kid is ever ready to see you again, I'll let you and B know where to find him," A single beep that indicated the end of the call before Jason is once again in front of him, tucking his phone into his back pocket.

Silence bounced between them, Tim standing stock still, and Jason shifting from foot to foot before clearing his throat.

"I uh...I heard you were a coffee addict, so I made a pot," Tim's eyes flick away from Jason's to the small kitchen behind him, steam rising from a pot on the counter, "I don't drink the crap, so it's just the cheap shit from the 7:11 down the street....Hope that's alright."

Tim nodded, eyes still wide, the arm that's hidden from view gripping the bat tightly. Because this has to be a trick. What Tim heard has to be faked, a prank. Jason wouldn't care about him this much. To go against Bruce and Dick. To bring him to his personal apartment. To buy him coffee and make it for him, when Tim knows he's more of a tea drinker himself.

His eyes trail after Jason as the older man returns the nod. He watches as Jason turns his back to him, walks to the kitchen counter, where a mug is already waiting, and poured a cup of delicious heaven.

Jason was cautious when he got within feet of Tim again, obviously on edge after watching Tim jump to his d-fall of a roof.

Tim let the bat hit the ground with a loud thump, of which Jason didn't even seem surprised by, and reached out from behind the cloth barrier to grab the mug (A deep red with the words 'My Favorite Zombie' printed on it), from his hand. 

"I made breakfast too. Nothing big since you probably haven't eaten much in a while, but I figured everyone liked waffles."

Despite the pleasantly warm mug in his hand, ice hits his chest fast, spreading through his veins to his legs and arms, then down to each individual finger and toe.

He must have taken to long to reply (Or maybe Jason can see the wetness of his eyes from where he stood) because Jason was hesitantly reaching a hand out to him before pulling it back to scratch the back of his head, "Is it...Can I..." A frustrated sigh, sounding more for Jason himself than Tim, "Do you want a hug?"

A hug? When was the last time Tim was ever hugged? Dick's tried to, since he came back to Gotham, but those always felt more like a trap than a hug. Bruce gave him a short one when Tim had saved him, but Tim had still been buzzing with adrenaline and could barely remember (Let alone feel) how that one arm had wrapped around his shoulders, squeezed once, and let go. 

Had Steph hugged him before she died?

He nods.

Each movement Jason makes is slow enough for Tim to keep up with, arms purposefully staying above the comforter as they wrap around his shoulders and ever so carefully tuck him close to Jason's chest. One warm hand pauses every couple seconds before resting on his back and rubbing circles against his spine through the several layers of fabric, and it makes Tim wonder when the last time _J_ _ason_ hugged someone too. The other eventually rests on the nape of his neck, a grounding move that Tim very clearly remembers both Dick and Bruce doing to him in the past.

Tim hadn't realized he was crying till Jason spoke, breath ruffling the hair on top of his head with each word. "You're going to be ok Tim..."

The mug continued to be a pleasant warmth between them, the handle tucked firmly against Tim's throat as he cried into Jason's chest. Jason simply kept repeating quiet promises of 'We'll get you help' and 'I'm right here' and 'You wont have to see them if you're not ready'.

Was this the soft side of Jason? The one Tim had captured in so many photos when he was still Robin? The one Alfred would always speak of so fondly whenever Tim managed to get him to speak of the boy at all? The one that made Batman chuckle and smile and snuck homeless kids granola bars and $20 bills when they weren't looking?

Another wave of quiet sniffles hit him at the thought. That Bruce was wrong. that _that_ Jason, the kind, sweet, selfless young Robin, was still alive and thriving. Simply hidden behind layer and layer of harsh words and severe actions and simple self defense.

They stood there for who knows how long, Tim eventually coming to rest completely against the taller man, knowing that if Jason moved he could very well fall right on his face. But his tears had stopped, his breathing matching perfectly in sync to Jason's, who's chest rose and fell with each deep breath against his ear.

"Do you want to try eating a little bit? It should still be warm," Jason's voice rumbled in his chest and Tim gave a reluctant nod. 

Despite Tim no longer crying, the only remaining evidence being his red cheeks and puffy eyes, Jason was still soft in directing him to the kitchen island, hand a firm weight on the back of his neck and only dropping away when tTm was fully seated at the breakfast nook, mug now resting on the counter in front of him.

Jason kept his promise, only giving him half a waffle already cut up into smaller pieces (Tim's curious if he should be offended or not), "You can have more after that if you want, but I want you to at least try to finish that," Jason kept his tone lightly, settling in the eat next to him with a plate piled with his own waffles, smothered in syrup.

When caught staring, Jason turned his nose up, "I'm a big guy ok? Don't listen to any of that trash Bruce feeds you, big guys need to eat, or all this muscle is just gonna turn to flab because there's nothing fueling the beef."

The words earn the smallest of smiles from Tim, Jason returning it with a big grin, said grin somehow growing more as he watches Tim stab a piece of waffle and eat it, humming in approval when the flavor hits his tongue.

"Good?" Tim gives a slight nod of the head, "I hope so, its based off what I remember of Alfred's recipe. Haven't met a single person who doesn't like them."

"Alfred taught you to make waffles?" His voice is scratchy when he speaks and he takes a sip of coffee to soothe his throat.

"And cook, and bake, and clean," Jason puts up a finger for every word, a fork hanging out of his mouth, "I wanted to learn everything I could back in the day. The only thing he could never teach me was proper etiquette."

"The only things I know how to make is cereal and grilled cheese."

"Didn't you ever watch your parents cook? Or did they fire chiefs to do everything?" The words weren't spoken with venom, more like pure curiosity, but Tim found himself flinching away from them anyways. So much so his chair screeched against the floorboards as he shifted back.

He could feel Jason's eyes boring into him, scanning him for weaknesses and preparing for a scolding for ruining his floor or being so sensitive to a simple question. Could already imagine the agitated stare being sent his way, paired with the drumming of elegantly long painted nails drumming on the counter top.

Tim knew this was all too good to be true. 

"Kid..."

Jason didn't _sound_ agitated, didn't sound ready to send him away or order him extra chores in payment. But Tim's been fooled before.

"Hey," A higher raised voice, shaky, "Kid, _Tim_ , I'm gonna touch you ok? Is that ok?" Tim might have nodded, seeing as a hand snuck its way into his line of sight, carefully prying the fork from his hand and resting it on a broad chest, "Match my breaths kiddo," In the distance Tim heard counting, the fabric under his finger tips rising and falling dramatically.

Following the pattern set, it wasn't long before Tim could once again feel his heels on the stood bar below him, could clearing hear each exaggerated breath Jason took, and managed to uncurl himself from the position he hadn't even realized he was in. 

Tim had just had an anxiety attack.

Over a simple question about his parents.

He drew his hand back from Jason's grasp, taking a sip of his (Now room temp) coffee. "I...I'm fine now," He set his mug back down, few remaining pieces of waffle on his plate abandoned.

Jason sighs softly next to him, "You're not. But that's ok," The words caught him off guard, but he didn't say anything, fingertips rubbing along the letters on the mug.

"Where did you learn that...? The breathing..? And..." He didn't have to finish the sentence for Jason to understand

_And how to calm someone down from an anxiety attack?_

The man next to him frowned obviously thinking as he stuffed another piece of waffle into his mouth, "A little from Bruce, when he was trying to help me with my anger as a kid. But I didn't really start using it till I started therapy."

Tim's eyes widen, his chest tightens, "You go to therapy? Do...do they know about?"

"My life of crime? My return from the dead? My dip in the pool?" A snort, "Yeah," Jason shrugs, and Tim thinks he almost looks like Tim just asked him the weather for the day. "It's the same woman Roy went to when he was struggling, and since she didn't spill the beans on him, he and Kori convinced me to see her. She doesn't know everything, but enough."

Tim's gripping the handle of his mug so tightly he thinks it might shatter in his palm, "Has it helped?"

The smile to grace Jason's face hit Tim all at once. Because Jason, for the first time since meeting him, even compared to all of the smirks and grins he's seen so far this morning, looked _happy._ Peaceful and calm and content. Teal eyes bright in the sun shining through the window behind him, posture relaxed and completely at ease.

"It has."

There was silence for several moments after the words were spoken before Tim spoke.

"I'm sorry you were there."

Tim didn't have to clarify what he was apologizing for. He kept firm control over his breathing, refusing to panic when Jason's soft eyes shifted over to him. He kept his eyes glued to the counter, palms now pressed flush to the tops of his thighs to ground him.

"I..." _D_ _amnit Tim, just open your mouth,_ "I..."

Tears were stinging his eyes. Tim's already cried so much today, more than he thinks he's cried since Bruce disappeared. Why? Why is it that the moment he's finally ready to let go, to be free of all the weight suffocating him every second of every day, that Jason can come in, save him, and make him feel so many emotions he's tried to force away for so long? 

Jason's tried to _kill_ him. Beat him and shot at him and tried every trick in the book to get rid of him.

So why...

Why didn't he just let Tim fall? 

He doesn't _understand_.

"Tim..."

_He hasn't called me replacement once._

"I'm sorry," The voice rings clear as day, Tim's eyes shooting up to meet Jason's, who stares at him with a weary expression

"God Tim..." He snorts, but it's not humorous, "I'm so fucking sorry. All the shit I've put you through? The trauma, the scars..." Jason bites his lip and Tim swallows, "It might not have been the only reason you jumped, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a part of the issue that lead to it."

And Tim can't deny that. The fact that the Robin he grew up with, snuck out to take pictures of, idolized with every fiber of his being? Mourned Jason when he learned he'd died, fought tooth and nail and worked hard to make sure Jason would be proud of whoever took over his title, had attacked him the moment he saw Tim in his costume? Tim won't say that fact didn't weigh him down when he thought about it, didn't make him nervous that Jason wouldn't come after him again.

But the fact that Jason saved him, held him close and cared for him? Wrapped his injuries, put a bat next to the bed because he knew Tim would feel safer with something to protect himself? Fought with _D_ _ick_ for him, defended him and made sure it was clear that Tim couldn't be around them? _Swore_ to take Tim away if the others even got close?

Tim thinks he could work on forgiving Jason. Even if it's only little by little.

He leans to the side, shoulder just brushing against Jason's. Thankfully, the older man didn't need words to understand what he was trying to say, returning the slight bit of contact gratefully.

"What now?" The words were quiet, whispered. Tim thinks they might have tasted forbidden on his tongue, like he should know what to do and not have to ask.

Jason sighs, "Well, I think right now we are in need of a serious comfort day. With movies and junk food and take out," A serious nod, apparently Jason takes his 'Comfort Days' very seriously, "Tomorrow? A walk, fresh air, we can try talking to a few people, I can set you up for an appointment with the doc if you want. Real nice lady, doesn't put up with anyone's bullshit."

Tim hums, shoveling the last few pieces of waffle into his mouth, savoring the remnants of lazy mornings with Alfred busy in the kitchen, Bruce occupied with a cup of coffee and the newspaper, and Dick singing along to a song playing on the radio while he grabs a glass of orange juice.

"Then lets get started."

**Author's Note:**

> Ok wow. I'm just going to apologize now for how long this took. I had already had a rough draft finished and ready, and then right before I posted it decided I didn't like it anymore. Which lead to me procrastinating on re-writing the whole thing, and not being able to decide on what I wanted to do, and THEN I started a couple multi-chapter fanfictions and there's just been a bunch going on. But I really like how it turned out. I've never been able to completely understand Tim's quick forgiveness to what Jason has done, because while I'm a firm believer that Jason wasn't completely in control, its still really hard to forgive anyone for doing something horrible to you, even if they couldn't help it. It takes time to learn to forgive them, to process what happened yourself, for them to earn back your trust. That takes time! But thankfully Tim's willing to take that time to learn forgiveness, and Jason's there to help him heal. I would still really be up for writing more in this universe if you guys were up for it though, so let me know if you want to see another part! As always, enjoy and let me know if I missed anything!


End file.
